A Magnum Opusum
1) Is that a joke?
2) I get it, its a joke!
3) Wait, thats not a joke...
4) If I have to explain, it isnt funny.
5) Everything is a joke
Do this, do that, follow all directions.
Do 99 situps and keep off the grass.
No left turn slow children fallen rock
Cant you read the signs?
I cant tell you but I can show you.
F N O R D
~zSkSc!
*****
A ZEN STORY
by Camden Benares,
The Count of Five,
Headmaster, Camp Meeker Cabal
A serious young man found the conflicts of mid 20th Century America confusing. He went to many people seeking a way of resolving within himself the discords that troubled him, but he remained troubled.
One night in a coffee house, a self-ordained Zen Master said to him, "go to the dilapidated mansion you will find at this address which I have written down for you. Do not speak to those who live there; you must remain silent until the moon rises tomorrow night. Go to the large room on the right of the main hallway, sit in the lotus position on top of the rubble in the northeast corner, face the corner, and meditate."
He did just as the Zen Master instructed. His meditation was frequently interrupted by worries. He worried whether or not the rest of the plumbing fixtures would fall from the second floor bathroom to join the pipes and other trash he was sitting on. He worried how would he know when the moon rose on the next night. He worried about what the people who walked through the room said about him. His worrying and meditation were disturbed when, as if in a test of his faith, ordure fell from the second floor onto him.
At that time two people walked into the room. The first asked the second who the man was sitting there was. The second replied "Some say he is a holy man. Others say he is a shithead."
Hearing this, the man was enlightened.
~Principia Discordia
Fundamenta Discordia v1.4
Discordian Foundations
1.1.1.3
CHAOS CHAOS CHAOS CONFUSION
.1 Chaos is the blank canvas of our perceived reality. Some will paint masterpieces, some will draw stick figures, others would rather watch television.
.2 When we perceive nothing the act of perception itself creates something from nothing.
.3 Every perspective is true from a particular vantage point and false from yet another vantage point. If enough vantage points are considered, the veracity of the perception itself becomes meaningless.
.4 It is inevitable that the thinking mind will proceed to categorize all of the available perceptions into a detailed flow chart that always has another page at the end of it.
.5 In the end, all the categories blend into a paisley wallpaper and fade into the background as newer, more exiting topics appear on the horizon.
~Zed Satelite, PoD, NCCDD, EEEyEEE, KSC!
*****
"
POEE (pronounced "POEE") is an acronym for The PARATHEO-ANAMETAMYSTIKHOOD OF ERIS ESOTERIC. The first part can be taken to mean "equivalent deity, reversity beyond-mystique." We are not really esoteric, it's just that nobody pays much attention to us.
~Principia Discordia
Voce del Coro:
who is the master
that makes the grass green
Oscar: I thought this was supposed to be about Discordianism
Vicky: Discordianism is about everything
Oscar: everything is a bit much to take in all at once
Vicky: This is the only a small glimpse of the foundation,
maybe just a part of the dust Cloud of the foundation.
Oscar: some of it seems to be unrelated,
in some sense
Vicky: If it started at the end,
it would all seem just as unrelated
Oscar: I think I'm going to need some solid principles to grab hold of, soon
Vicky: One of the principles is 5,
The five principles are 1
Oscar: ok, 5, got it
tell me some more about this chaos thing
Vicky: Chaos leads to discord
Voce del Coro:
TRUE! FALSE! MEAN-ING-LESS
~Zed Satelite PNCCDD ksc
